Finnished reading Den onde hyrde by Jens bjørbeboe
It was wonderfully written and i had to sit and contemplate after i had finniehed it.
It is about the young adult Tonnie which has been locked it for most of his life: 10 years in orphanage, labour prison and finally, normal prison. Tonnie wants to participate in society and be "a normal, honourable human", but after a long change of happenings where he gets pushed more and more away from society he gets thrown in prison again, going mad. The book ends with:

"Tonnie was far, far away, in another land, where everything was different, where there wasnt any up and down and there wasnt any right or left, and where there was no walls between the things. Sometimes there glimmered angst in him."

When i read trough the story i was mentally yelling to the characters to do something else... A bit ignorant on my part? I started wondering if there existed any reader of my story and whether if they also yelled at me to do something else... If there was- then what would it be?
Troughout the book we also get to meet Rødtopp (Redhead)- also a criminal with a similar background with Tonnie, but seeminly have gone uncaught and lived in the woods by stealing and petty crimes. He could be seen playing his harmonica with his dirty hands and being jolly. To me, Rødtopp adapted to the life of society and a criminal- life with one foot within both. He did not try to force things in order to fit in, and he did not have any(or much) close connections to anyone. He was highly adaptable and the reason for his survival, i think, was that he let go of the thought of bending the system and he realized the reality of his position and stayed there. Troughout the book Rødtopp is the voice of reason to Tonnie. Telling him how he will never be a "normal, honourable citizen" and that he was destined to be outside of the system. A thought that i particularly said to Tonnie: why cant he work on living both worlds? But that is the meaning. Tonnie represent the nostalgia from the past, fixed state, exsternal state which is deemed for setbacks and misery.
Honestly a heartbreaking piece, but a terrifingly a realistic one- Bjørbeboe was known for having strong compassionship with the people that society deemed as losers. He wrote out of his own exsperience with the justice system and he critisized it immensly in his works. And the system ostracized him back.